Many people wonder and regularly ask me, why I continually write articles to a site about “how i quit weed” when most of time I’m still smoking weed and getting high. First glance it may seem a confusing message, but the fact is the more of an addictive I am the more it qualifies to talk about this subject. One the most impelling reasons I continue to keep writing is because while being a weed junkie and telling my story, I try to be as honest to myself and to you guys as much as I can and many people have reached out to me and told me how they relate to what I’m talking about. Along with the those emails, I also get people just shouting out raw abuse at me, which I don’t mind either I try and encourage people to comment more and share their thoughts publicly and of course anonymously however I understand this subject is a personal and you’re welcome to be as private as you like. What I tell the people who rain down with abuse is, if what I talk about makes sense cool if not that’s also fine because we’re all different and act, relate, talk and think completely uniquely to one another and hey if you really feel getting high of your face makes you that you’re at 200% efficiency then you’re entitled to that opinion.
Fully Exposed!
The truth is, 2013 got pretty bad for me, I dunno why that was the case as it was I found myself picking up 2 grams for £20 smoking pretty heavily throughout the night, then round about 6am I’d really be having the munchies to which I’d drive about 5 miles to the local McDonalds Drive through and order about £10 worth of food just for myself. I would love it, and hate myself as I’d struggled to move while I was trying to sleep, which was not daytime and while I smoked my “bedtime spliff” out of my window I’d see loads of people walking to the train station on their way work. As a freelancer, most of my work would be online and I could do stuff in my own time, and that was the reasoning that got me through most mornings.
“….Craig David 7 days, cmon..”
So with almost nothing to do with Craig David, however a lot with 7 days, so much has changed! So after many many “that’s it guys I’m gonna smoke like a b**ch and quit in a blaze of glory” <add link> to be phoning up my dealer the next day asking if he’s around. I think things have got so bad in the last couple of months my resolve was more powerful than it had ever been and without really overthinking it or making a huge deal of it, on Tuesday night I choose to not smoke a joint, though my physiological cravings were going nuts, I kept cool and just smoked a rollie, to which those unaware is just rolling tobacco that you stick a little filter tip on the end and roll it up and smoke it. It’s cheaper than buying cigarettes but that’s not why I resort to them for price, it’s the fact a cigarette has so much tobacco in the damn thing, more than I wanna smoke. The benefit of using rolling tobacco is that you can really moderate and control the amount of tobacco you’re smoking. So came Wednesday night, and one of my best friends called me up asking me if I was getting any from my guy, I told hesitated and during the phone call I completely caved arranged a session with him later on that night. However my conscientious got the better of me, and after hanging up I texted my friend back making an excuse that he wasn’t around that evening. Now that I think about it that really was the turning point where things go wrong and I fall back into my usual habit of addiction, however not this time. Admittedly the first couple of nights there are physical issues like sleep deprivation or anxiety problems that can crop up while being without however I just powered through that.
An Early Spliff Test
I say out of nowhere, but realistically all my friends smoke weed so this shouldn’t have surprised me, I got a whiff of weed as he was rolling up a big fat joint, we went outside and I didn’t smoke any of it, and I was completely fine with that. This than happened more a few more times during the evening where everybody went out to smoke their joints, while I smoked my rollies and by the evening time it wasn’t even an issue, as I’d got used to this setup. On reflection I’m feeling quite liberated and powerful that I was able to exert an element of discipline.
How Do I Feel?
I wrote about this (sadly) along time ago, when I managed to quit for the first time, which was the birth of this blog in fact. I feel great, I get up from bed so much easier p.s I fixed my body clock now, to waking up at 7am and sleeping 11pm like work hours. I see the sunrise and see lots of daylight, and even if I spend hours messing around it’s still only midday, which is great feeling that I can crack on with work, head down the bank for a walk/run the world is open and still my oyster. I know that they’ll be trace T.C.H attached onto my fat cells for another month most likely, but not enough to make a difference on how I’m feeling, which is great by the way, cos the fact that I’ve been able to make a change feels so empowering, this is who I always wanna feel. Furthermore I bet the next time I get high, as we all know when you haven’t smoked for a bit, it’s fricking AWESOME!!!
Don’t Overthink it Just Do It
Not to pawn of Nike cliche phrase here, but I think that’s what I was doing i.e overthinking everything. I really made a massive song and dance in my head about the day of stopping, and really made too much of it. I’m all for preparation and trying to be steps ahead of the game, but sometimes the easiest thing to do is really just to throw yourself off the cliff and que sera sera (A spanish phrase. Translation: What will be, will be.)
