So it’s happened again and you don’t know how or why the hell this did happen after you tried so hard and actually succeeded in giving the weed smoking a break. Typically you never saw it coming as you smoked weed again and for that duration it was fine, however it was only when this duration kept going and it finally dawned on you, that “hold on, i’ve been smoking a lot recently!” Now one only wants to quit something when they feel that it is harming them or is not right in some way.
CIRCLES OF FRIENDS & PEOPLE
This will just always keep coming up as it’s one of the biggest culprits as to why people “fall of the wagon” and find themselves in exactly the same situation they’d worked so hard to break free from. The likelihood is that your close associates or smoking partners are probably near by and so you may feel the calling to quit but does everybody else around you feel the same? The unfortunate likelihood is probably not. So ultimately you’re not just having to stop smoking weed, but also stop hanging out with your circles of friends!! While also in the case of having siblings that may live in the same house or are smoking in close proximity to you it becomes even more harder to achieve this goal.
MENTAL ASSOCIATIONS
We looked closer into this in the article IS IT YOU THAT WANTS WEED OR IS IT YOUR ROOM? where activities we do regularly while being high can start the strong cravings to be hight again when we attempt these same activities but sober. For we sub-conscientiously mentally attribute and associate the feeling of being high with that activity! This can be very difficult, as if you’ve got used to way of living where you did almost everything high, living your whole life sober can be a challenge as you’ll constantly be reminded of rolling a spliff. These mental assossiation are very strong things and side effects are often experiencing flashbacks, and feeling like you’re high even though you haven’t smoked anything.
SELF JUSTIFICATION
When you find yourself in this loop, it can be a tough one to break out of because ultimately you’re in deep denial and your brain reacts to this but justifying and self rationalising your behaviour. This process doesn’t involve anybody as it’s personal and effectively tries to set your overall opinion to one where you’re not in a severe situation and things aren’t as bad, and you’re life style maybe isn’t perfect but fine. You perhaps then compare yourself to others less able then yourself and in worser situations to match yourself feel better, and by the end of it you’re smoking way blissfully and that sense of doing a bad thing to yourself is completely gone. Denial is dangerous almost hypnotic state of mind for whilst it consumes you… you’re blinded to the truth.
NO REAL AMBITION
It’s hard to admit this one, but if your hearts not really in it then you’ll never succeed as you wont really be trying but moreover telling yourself that you are. This is what I consider as being in the worst or both worlds, as in you’ll always be chastising yourself for when you break your resolve to quit, but ultimately never really letting yourself enjoy. If you find yourself here, just make a decision!! Do you want to smoke or not ? If you do, then just smoke for as counterintuitive as that may sound, constantly bar-ratting yourself is equally as unhealthy and can lead to depression and could cause the situation to grow out of control. When you truly decide it’s your time, then that’s only when you should make an effort not before.
BORDOM
So you’ve now quit, it’s been 2 days since you toked on that joint, and it dawns on you that maybe you were just bored when you would smoke and are bored now. It’s very common, people just filling time smoking weed and putting on YouTube etc, they’re killing time. Not taking anything away from the effect of the weed itself, but when you’re a regular smoker does the effect really stop from doing anything you normally would have done? Probably not. If you did use weed to fill time, then the answer is simple you need a new hobby or a better way to fill time. Your brain may fool you into thinking that there isn’t anything worth doing that compared to smoking, but this is bullshit. When you’ve managed to get weed out of your bloodstream you’ll find your brain will start offering more practical solutions again.
LIFESTYLE
Maybe it’s your lifestyle i.e. how you roll (excuse the pun), and as mentioned above the people you hang with on a regular basis, what you do on a regular basis. Being honest with you, if all your friends are stoners and all you do is sit around (by yourself or with them) and get high, then if you’re seriously wanting to quit for a while then you’re gonna find it fucking difficult. Having integrated cannabis so deeply into your life, will mean when you do try and stop the cravings are gonna be coming from all places, as almost everything will remember you that “YOU ARE NOT HIGH” and those fucked up craving message i.e. “YOU MUST GET HIGH” will be coming at you full force. I recommend to people that are in this boat, do yourself a massive favour!! Time for a change of scenery, or go somewhere where it’ll be really difficult for you to pick up or smoke the weed. This way at least you’re lessening the visual cues and reminders and it may really help you get over the initial bump of the 1st weeks cravings. Once you’re past that, things always get easier and easier in the craving depart.
So you’ve been smoking every day and dreaming of that quite break that never came – stuck in a loop huh? When this happens you either go one of many ways, 1) you actually do something and quit for a bit 2) you keep putting off quitting till tomorrow which also is the same time you’re gonna start your diet 3) You go into deep denial and justify your lifestyle and behaviour as being “normal” If category one is your thing lucky you, with categories two and three being effectively the same thing, i.e. whether you’re in denial or not you’re still smoking weed every day and lets not fuck around here IT ISN’T GOOD FOR YOU. Also note this advise comes to you from a lover of the herb and I believe that like pizza or anything if you eat it everyday it probably isn’t gonna taste as good as it would if you eat it like normal people do i.e. now and again. People chase highs by yearning for stronger and stronger gear without realising that their bodies have become completely resilient to getting high on any level leaving only THC infused insulator crystals just about doing the trick.
For some being in this repeating pattern of addiction repeatedly for years and years have almost laser etched into their brains their drug addition lifestyle and the thought of trying to unlearn something as profoundly drummed into you like that can seem daunting. Good news for those worriers, it’s just a worry and nothing more than that, for learning anything, i.e. even things you’re trying to unlearn is the same as just learning something new. It doesn’t seem like it, cos you seem to know so much about this topic how possibly could be like new? Well that’s the thing you’re learning to act and behave in a completely brand new way and of it’s verture of being new that validates it.
“Don’t you think you’re smoking alittle too much these days?” she asks concerningly, BATTLESTATIONS!!!! RED ALERT, DEFENSES TO MAXIMUM CAPTAIN, BRACE OF IMPACT .. you deflect the question with lots of well argued, reasonable points like “No, it’s fine, i’ve got everything under control, my life is great, I don’t do it that much, you’ve just seen me doing it a few times, it’s a concidence” You deliver your lines, a performance worth appauding, the other person accepts the well tuned answer and the conversation moves on, you move down to YELLOW ALERT and as you were. Addicts will seldomly appreciate that the drug has changed them in someway, but the change happens so slowly and smoothly it’s hard to really detect until you get in really close. The formulae is usually the same, person A starts doing drugs, they get hooked on it, and get stop doing it, fall off the wagen effectively, people start to notice. You fight them off for a while, and justify the rest in your head – until you really fall off your rocking chair and then if people love you the close ones will be knocking down your doors while you try to escape them in your drugged up shroud. Can you admit it’s over? Your friend and family have now all found out about your junky lifestyle, there’s no more places to run to, nowhere to hide. Even six of your finest LSD tabs will not and cannot offer you refuge as your brain will keep going back to that place you want to run and hide from. Sorry dude, it’s offer, but the good news is we’re coming to save your life.
When you’ve been messed up and taking some crazy shit for x,y,z number of days the chances are you’ve probably completely forgotten what it feels like to be you again, you know what i mean, sober you? remember you at your most powerfulest? Of course, chances are you’ve forgotten how that even feels. Remember something, being sober as much a mindset as being on a drug. Many believe smoking weed enhances them? Do you believe drinking does the same thing?? Is that why you can’t drive for shit when you’re drunk or high of your balls, can’t remember a god damn thing, great way to be before an exam right?? Or how about even just being in a conversation.
A bunch of dumbass motherfuckas on twitter all attacked me last year, saying that “nahh fool, weed isn’t additive” You guys are all fucking morons and don’t know what you’re talking about. Anything can be addictive, the trick is not to get addicted to the point you don’t enjoy doing it anymore. If someone you love is lost to drugs, I’m sorry i have no real advise but to say don’t give up on them and keep offering the way out cos they may take it.
So you’ve just smoked a fat dubee with some others and man are you high!!! However something isn’t right, you can’t quite put your finger on it, for people are talking around you and you want to get into the conversation but for some reason you have thought about what you’re going to say, weirdly in advance, and now waiting your turn for person talking to stop so you can say your ten pence worth. “However what if the conversation has moved on by then” “People will think I’m a loser or really SAD!” “my comment might not be that funny??!” “fuck it , I wont say it, play it safe ” So in this way you say nothing at that point & generally in the conversation, and the thoughts just build up in your head to the point where the resultant effect of loads of brain chit chatter is like a stream of tennis balls being fired at you, i.e you can deal with a few tennis balls right? but after about 5 minutes of constant barrage they will eventually hurt you, and like so thus you’ve caved and now are listening to your brain double guess everything you’re doing, throwing questions of doubt at every opportunity! Ultimately really not being able to make a single statement with any real belief or confidence! AH man you’re really not having a good night, and who can blame you, for the weed has made you paranoid! Many people decline when offered cannabis as they very openly admit that it makes them introverted and very self conscientious.
So what’s going on here, why are some people being effected like this and others not – some take it very personally and feel it makes them less of a person or perhaps implying that they as an individual have more paranoid tendencies than others. Now this could be totally true with the person quite potentially being more paranoid in nature, however generally speaking as an assessment this is completely an overkill as getting paranoid on weed is far more common than the likelihood of that individual having a paranoid delusions or being mentally ill.
We as the human species are extremely diverse in all our varieties, so logically it is extremely feasible that the receptors in our brain are also as diverse in how they react to different chemicals. Just from my experience alone, I’ve seen different body types being sometimes more or less resilient to smoking weed i.e. with some people requiring stupid amounts of cannabis to get high and others getting “MASHED!” on just a few toaks. Levels of weed tolerance is a fairly intuitive thing to notice when smoking weed with others as generally you’ll have smoked the same weed, along with similar quantities, however some will be noticeable higher than others. The opposite can be argued and proven with some weight when mearly just being around people getting high, i.e. through social matching and mirroring a person’s mind could be fooled into thinking they are high, a level of conformity by just just being surrounded by fellow weed smokers. Using the mind argument you could also argue opinion is an important factor with the possiblity that two people could be equally as high as each other however only one person admits to being high whereas the other quite legitimately is wanting to get more stoned until they classify themselves as high. Thus when you bring individual perspective into play along with actual body chemistry it’s difficult to really determine which is effecting a person more and in this way is very similar to the nature versus nuture argument. So we’ve explored how the “Perspective versus Chemistry” applies to weed tolerance, however this is equally as applicable to how the weed effects your brain and your mood i.e whether you’ll experience paranoia while high.
Many smokers commonly talk about how being in social environment the conversation is set by the group and is always constantly moving thus the person is so distracted he/she doesn’t really have the time to think negative / self loathing thoughts until they’ve returned home and now are sharing a moment with themselves. Regular smokers are probably used to this phenomenon and have without realising have built their own tolerance to ignoring any negative brain chatter or if the occasional negative thought does arise, it’s just dismissed as “ahh i’m high whatever!!” While some adopt even simpler common methodology by just keeping the TV on or play some computer games or have some interesting YouTube preloaded to watch after the spliff to keep yourself entertained (“distracted”) from those voices that come from your stoned sub conscientious. There’s no fixed rule that says that only negative thoughts come from up there however if you are having moments of jubilation and euphoria then we’re all happy for you but if you’re reading this article it’s odds on you’ve probably experienced the negative and wish to explore why.
If this has happened to you or persists on being a thorn in your side, DON’T WORRY for this is much more common an issue than you are probably aware. From my personal experience many of my close friends and relatives whom I regard as extremely balanced individuals with positive outlooks on life when extreme peer pressure finally makes them cave to sharing a joint with the group do suffer in these ways. I’m not really sure which argument I agree with from “smoking weed will free your mind but bewarned what could emerge” implying that everybody gets it, but regulars are better skilled to handle it OR “it depends on who are you and what you smoke – some weed does x,y,z to person A and not to person B”. In my personal experience I’d say it was a combination of both. Unfortunately this isn’t really a topic that can be nominally investigated as the perspective aspect relies strongly on underpinned opinions. These opinion are based on people’s foundations on which varies a lot on their differing life particulars, with that said stay tuned to this article for I’m keen to try out some experiments of my own to build a firmer conclusion on this subject.
New Year with the Bash being cancelled last minute as the host fancied “..a quiet one in front of the tele”, only to be lumbered with more work as my Dad decided to go on a last minute long holiday leaving me to do all his duties & work on top of that. And then of course, my birthday being fairly bedridden for a couple of weeks (the inspiration behind the article 
As the economy worsens and our beloved big PLC air carriers & airports are left feeling the brunt, after a few brutal hours of head scratching, they concoct a devious plan to siphon more money from the innocent unsuspecting traveller. Initially naive to this, as we approach Stansted Airport we’re immediately encoutered with a change, for no more are there signs posted with familiar words like “Departures” & “Arrivals” short stay, mid stay etc but instead EXPRESS SET DOWN, and FREE SET DOWN. A no brainer to many – “I’m not paying for just getting out of the damn car, why you charging me for this shit for?”. A good question, “..so errr FREE SET DOWN it is then”. At this point as you unconsciously make your decision, you notice the FREE SET DOWN is a road going quite positively in the wrong direction of the airport. Huh?? “is that why it’s free, cos you’ll need another plane to fly to the normal set down point” Whatever….!! no time to think about this, you’ve got a plane to catch!!! “DAD PULL UP ANYWHERE!!!”. He pulls up on the motorway, to which my girlfriend and I proceed to dodge headlights and on coming traffic from behind us as we run towards the airport. “the adventure starts here huh” she jokes, as I smirk while panting for air, pulling the damn trolley at its wheel’s nominal maximum MPH. On entering the airport we search for our checkin desk. On approaching the queue for EASYJET, a lady asks in her strangely hyperactive and over enthusiastic manner “Do you have EARLY BIRD, NO WAITING , JUST A 
QUICKY BOARDING PASS …. ” she looks down “..or the ordinary boarding pass”. Of course we have the later, cos nobody in their right minds would spend £20 / ticket just to skip over a minor queue! Alas we join a line which zigzags, semicircles and does donuts on itself, while the TURBO, CHEMICALLY ENHANCED SUPER QUEUE has no-one there…So fast forward to waiting in line behind the skinhead with a tattoo “death to all ethnics” on the back of his skull, we’re now being told “you must pay more if you’d like to sit together” … (we didn’t and still sat together). EasyJet are now charging for fresh air in it’s cabin during the flight, alternatively you can go for the free option which is old recycled farty air being pumped at you…Ok I made up this last bit about the air, but it’s really going that direction, ONE DAY I SAY”
which really was the shit!!! We made our way to Sheeba Coffeeshop where we ordered two coffees and a chocolate space cake, along with a PRE-ROLLED (should be called perfectly rolled) WHITE WIDOW DUBEE!!! Oh hallelujah, this is what it was all for, this moment. Ok.. I was tired, and while I should have done, I hadn’t slept the night before because (as always) I left my packing to the last minute. I was knackered, and mildly drowsy however i proceeded to tuck into my PURE WHITE WIDOW joint and though it did fuck me up even more (in a nice way) it felt fucking great.
My girlfriend doesn’t smoke spliffs and hence chose the 100% healthy consumption method of vaporising and eating SPACE CAKES. When buying the weed cakes, the shop selling always checks if you’ve ever done them before and tells you of their danger. The cakes are made from pure cannabis butter, along with pure resin, which packs a punch as when baked the weed will be at it’s full T.H.C potency. The cakes, depending on what you buy, typically contain half a gram of pure weed and can take up 45-90 minutes to take effect. As the cake / weed content has been digested, the effect can be extremely strong / psychedelic and can last up to many several hours.
Now I’ve never really experienced highs like this outside of the Dam!! This is primarily for Amsterdam has several decades worth of practice on expert growing tips on how to grow the finest high grade, setting up coffee shops, selling and maintaining a stable economy where people responsibly smoke weed peacefully right along side those that are drinking alcohol. Additionally banning coffeeshop premises from selling alcohol alongside weed. On the whole there is no trouble, and when there is a problem you see the shop keepers spring into action and quickly resolve all the problems, and then within minutes everything is back to normal again with people walking into the coffeeshop premises completely blissful that trouble was afoot only moments ago. The dutch model took the problem of street illegal drug trafficking (which many viewed as completely unsolvable) and by controlling the industry themselves (i.e. enforcing quality laws, with good practices) They have substantially reduced if not completely eradicated the existence of gangs and cartels based on selling those substances. The only issue was during the last couple of years with the invention of the ISOLATORS (extremely high THC potency) it brought in a lot of drug tourism which caused the Dutch to re-evaluate their current policies on drugs. This brought in the introduction of the “V Pass” which effectively proposed to turn all the Dutch coffeeshop into “members only” facilities, giving access to V passes to only Dutch Citizens/permanent residents. However as of 2013, the Netherlands have made a complete U-Turn on the V pass policy, and when we went there everything was pretty normal. BLOODY HOORAY FOR THAT!
Despite a few states in America and random European countries having legalised cannabis, it really is not the same! The Dutch have so many decades worth of cultural and society evolution, that it has given them loads of time to really refine the process from growth, packaging and retail. Ok enough of this, the main question?? why is the weed over in Amsterdam just so much better than the stuff we get anywhere else??! According to the Dutch Shop “it’s a shcretttt of the growherS” (said in your best Dutch accent) SECRET HUH?? well maybe it’s true because the seeds are the same, and well these guys must have learnt a thing or two during their years of cross breading etc. The minute you look, smell and ultimately smoke some bud you instantly can tell the difference. Even more so if you’re from the UK, cos really things in this country are in a bad state for us Brits as the consumer are at the bottom of the weed food chain!! i.e. BIG BIG DEALER picks up a couple of kilos —-> he deals to sub dealer who buys a smaller quantity and picks up a good number of ounces —–> he then sells to another dealer who buys one or two ounces, i.e. the street dealer whom the consumer will purchase from. When the consumer buys his quantity of weed from the dealer it has been passed down three generations before getting to him, which could possibly effect the potency of the T.H.C as it would be older. In comparison to the Dutch Coffeeshops, the owners there would directly get in touch with the weed growers first hand, there by serving nothing but the freshest produce to his customers.
I gotta be honest, moderation didn’t really work for me mainly cos I love the effect of weed too much. As a person I’m always trying to be productive and work on many different projects as I can, and to be honest the best release for me has gotta to be throwing it all in at the end of a hard day, kicking back with a fat spliff, just to sit back and chill. My brain’s always ticking and ticking and never really seems to stop, and I guess that is my attraction to smoking weed for things to stop and then I get my chance to really relax! However the shit (and it really is shit) we’re smoking in the UK is horribly disgusting. Even what we regard as GOOD SHIT comparatively is really not and is just bollox. I’ve just come from Amsterdam and have been really RE-REMINDED of the difference in grades of weed, so much so I’ve finally made that decision of “To Do or Not to Do” and I’ve been avoiding this for a long time, I tell you that but the truth is, in the last couple of years smoking weed hasn’t been good for me. The effect hasn’t ever really met standards i.e. wasn’t being high another way of saying I’m happy!! The munchies you get from the weed in the U.K have destroyed my waistline, that these days I could padlock my wardrobe and the lose the key and it wouldn’t matter, as I can’t fit into anything anymore. However in Amsterdam , the weed did not give me the uncontrollable munchies, nor did it make 
me feel like shit the next day and generally it was a joy to smoke!! My reasons may be whack, but I’ve really had enough of the UK underground weed supply network, I’ve been smoking this shit long enough to know what the deal is (a couple of grams too short). I yearn for a better day and that will be probably back in Amsterdam sitting around a table with people close to me in a Coffeeshop while I spend a fraction of the money I’ve saved by not touching the shit that’s available in the UK! The ideal middle ground was moderation, but we chastise ourselves for being ill disciplined, but lets be realistic here for a minute and be honest to yourself. How can you chastise yourself for yearning something you really love? Can that be moderated? If you find it easy to moderate it, then that’s indicative of how much you truly appreciate it – which is fine, but you’re not whom I’m talking about. Your fix or thing is probably something possibly Alcohol or Chocolate anything! So I guess, for the time being it looks like I bid my farewell to real ganj, if you can get me some, I’ll smoke it… if not which is the most likely, I wont…
So now and again it happens, you get ill & did I forget to mention that well you smoke a lot ganga ontop of this. People at this point can go many ways, like pointing at their addictions and say “That’s why i got ill, I smoke too much!” Others blame a cold, or a viral infection which is usually more the likely story. So in this tale of recollection it happened to me, yeap straight after my birthday I got a nasty flu. I had fever which made no sense, and it took me about a week to recover from it all, to which until then I’d went to go a doctor. He diagnosed with a chest infection and gave me a week course of antibiotics. Throughout this whole period I had not smoked any weed or touched anything as i was pretty fucked anyway.
A lot of people don’t believe in signs, but maybe you should open yourself up to the possibility that your body is trying to tell you something. If you’re coughing that much and coughing out different coloured flems, then you definitely have a infection of some sort and you should stop smoking IMMEDIIATELY!! I’m no doctor, but that’s what my doctor told me and i’m guessing any half qualified doctor would tell you.
Right they were! I was too ill to be smoking weed!! During my chest infection, for some reason my ribs felt like Floyd Mayweather had been sparring on them, i.e. they hurt like hell!! So asked around to my friends if anybody had this, or knew what the hell it was, and as I’d expected nobody had a clue. Well I say that, but they all became experts and starting tell me their coughing rib stories AFTER I GOT BACK FROM THE DOCTOR WHO EXPLAINED TO ME THE WHOLE THING! Thanks for being so useless friends, but generally they’re just there to keep you busy from being productive. Of course, after I’d done my googling,.. all my friends where full of stories.. “YEAHHH I had that…” , in my mind thinking we had this same conversation last week and you knew nothing?? anyway… when your friends are telling you to stop smoking weed, that’s a extreme in my book it’s probably a good idea to quit.
It is me or when I change my surrounding or I stay at some other place I don’t really NEED to get high, i.e. all the urgency and desperation that I suffer when I’m low on dope isn’t really there. I stayed at my girlfriend’s house for a couple of nights and she doesn’t smoke or really like me doing it either, but I go down there and don’t smoke it doesn’t really effect me. SO I ask is it me who’s addicted or is it my room? WHat the fuck you talking about fool? I hear you lamenting, okay alright I’m not actually saying that your room is the addict but quite possibly could be the trigger. At this point another group of people will start shouting, “hey motherfucka, what’s wrong with smoking weed!” – NOTHING in moderation – but that’s not the point… ok lets start again,
It’s commonly accepted that we get totally different buzzes when we try different forms of alcohol. So when we speak about alcohol does one distinguish beer from wine, or ale from spirits? They say that weed affects everybody in different ways, which certainly makes sense but then appreciating that all strands of canabis can be fundamentally different in effects and be administered completed differently changing almost everything.
Cos everywhere I went “Hey man have you tried a vapouriser (we’re in the UK)?” YOu haven’t tried iT??? ” However the weird thing, everybody going crazy about this magical device but NOBODY seemed to have one or know anyone that did! So finally I went on Ebay and bought a AROMATHERAPY MACHINE! aka legal way of selling the VAPOURISER . When I first open the device out of the box, I was like “How is this gonna work?” but it was pretty straight forward in usage, so I managed to work it out. I thought I’d wait and get used to the device before I wrote up an article about it.. So I’ve been using this box of tricks for a couple of months now and I’ve found it to be GREAT!! I fucking love it!
I remember my American friends asking “why you putting tobacco in that shit??” Yes us Europeans use tobacco when we roll and call it a “SPLIFF”. WHy? Well for many reasons!! Surrounding the weed in tobacco burns the weed hotter, and thus gets more T.H.C out of it. Unless your WEED is 100% A GRADE it won’t burn properly all the way through, and this is only way to roll it without having to relight it every 20 seconds. Vapourising – benefits for us British & European Folk. – The Residue!! Many people only have started using the residue of the vapourising session as a substitute of tobacco. This is a great idea as smoking tobacco without a filter (i.e. what you do when smoking a spliff) releases some FUCKED UP carcinogens like benzine and hydrogen cyanide which is the worst thing anybody could ever do!! and fuck we do it all the time!! – Doing this is a much clever way of smoking weed.
So you’ve been to your local head shop and boy you went all out!! You not only bought a funky grinder with Amsterdam 420 written on it but you got yourself a vapouriser, a colourful bong and even large rips to enjoy your luscious weed!! Now the big problem …. Where do i get weed from? I need weed!!!! Indeed you do but as you scratch your head you wonder and try to hatch a plan that’ll end in success. So you grab your phone and start calling around. The problem here however is who to call / who to ask. Now if a weed smoker is known to you, all your problems should end right there but unfortunately life’s never that simple.
So your friend Jimi’s just passed on a number for a dealer he knows that he picks up the ganja locally with the implicit instructions to let the dealer know you’re “Jimi’s Mate!” So at this point this all sounds like a winner..you can almost taste the promised land right there!! however… you call the dealer, he picks up the phone and says “WHO DIS?” and as planned “I’m Jimi’s friend” you reply in your most COOLEST TONE! “What – Who Jimi?”. With things going off the script you quickly attempt to add description to his in the effort that the dealer will recognise your referral and thus legitimise your sale. From here onwards this can go either one of two ways with the dealer pretending to remember your friend, cos lets be honest all he really know about your buddy is his phone number and that’s about it! Soon following to which he concedes and deals you what you’re after. – Or Mr.Dealer telling you “Listen I I don’t know who gave you my number but I don’t know you, DON’T CALL ME!” It was so simple, yet you have failed in this task. You immediately text Jimi “He told me to not call him!!” Jimi’s with the world best intentions is a stoner and you not realising what that means yet won’t dawn on you that means you ain’t getting no weed today! “Next time, i’ll just go through Jimi!” Bring on WEED TAX!!!!!!
So you call up the your friend with the long hair, for you’re sure he does! “Hey mike, how’s it going man, I was wondering? Do you smoke Weed and if so can you sort me out?” This is pot luck as does Mike smoke weed? If he does is he gonna help you by supplying you with his dealers details? All these questions flooding into your mind at a thousand miles a second!! You both experience that really ackward moment, “errrr hey erm, i don’t really smoke man. Can I ask what made you think of me?” Shit he’s offended.. your cover has been totally blown, you can’t tell him the truth you’ll sound retarded! Anyway… you politely make up some bullshit and end the call as soon as you can!
Now that plan didn’t work you didn’t want to admit it, but you call the guy you initially thought of, that’s right your friend Tyrone – who just coincidentally happens to be black! Now this isn’t only racial sterotyping / racist in all of it’s undertones but just WRONG!! For it’s T.V. and society that makes you believe these stereotypes because in real life everybody does it regardless of their skin! Tyrone answers the phone… you’re nervous, and he can hear it.. “errr hey” .. You think to yourself have you ever addressed anybody with “err hey!” you quickly conclude not. “Dude, do you smoke weed?” you ask him.. “What?” he replies. “.. I mean, Ganja, you know marijuana, cannabis!!” Why am going through all the names, he understood the question I just don’t want to be racist, i’m not racist, i love BLACK PEOPLE!! ok that’s not true, as i love black people as much as i do white, black or orange people I dunno what i’m saying!!! “Do i smoke weed?” he repeats the question. “I have smoked weed yeah, what? or why do you wanna know?” he replied. Phewwww… you’re happier as the conversation is going the right way now “it’s cos I need some, can you get me marijuana?” you tell him. He politely declines and you don’t force the issue either but instead like before get out of that conversation as quickly as you can “sorry dude, my phones ringing” realising the stupidity of what you’ve just said, you just hang up! In your mind you plan if you see him again, you’ll just tell him that you were drunk or like fucked in some way.
I think by now you appreciate that this isn’t gonna go easy, and you’re gonna fuck this up one way or another, either that or you’re just not very good at asking or just generally talking to people! So you phone up Tim and just tell him. “Dude, I’m really desperate to trying to hold of some weed! Please tell me that you know where or somebody that can help me pick up!” “Dude, I appreciate your problem, but I’m really sorry I quit years ago.. What made you think of me?” he replies.. “ahhhhhh nothing!!!!!, errrr you know just asking anybody, no reason hehheeh, you know how it is” you nervously say. You don’t wanna tell him it’s cos you think he’s a jobless bum but somehow you just know that he’s read your mind on that.
In short we conclude this, by really appreciating that the herb that we so seek, unless you live in Amsterdam or Cali, is ILLEGAL! & that’s about it. Dealers are taking big risks by selling weed and if they don’t think you add up, they don’t need to risk selling to you. If you really don’t have any friends that can point you in the right directions with some contacts just going around asking random people could get you into so much bullshit with the most randomest people. Not just that, the stuff you eventually pick up probably won’t be even be that good.